Oktoberfest
We spent 8pm-12:30am last night working a booth dispensing "bier" at Oktoberfest in downtown Denver last night. It was a great time, although this year I spent more of the time pouring than dealing directly with patrons, which is less fun. The already-very-drunk guys coming back to refill their 1 liter stein for a third and fourth time really make the whole experience - between the slurring and the mindless flirtation with anything over two feet tall, there's no end to the excitement. Yet despite all the fun of 2,000 drunk people herded into 2 city blocks, there are some down sides to Oktoberfest. I'd like to offer some advice to new patrons to help keep the festival the fun, friendly, family event it's intended to be.
1.) Don't drink Coors light. At $5 a beer, get something more exciting! I'm pretty sure you can buy a 6 pack of Coors for not more than that at your local grocery store.
2.) Don't drink Coors light. It's Oktoberfest! Drink something other than the same old cheap crap you chug every weekend to get drunk watching sports with your neighbors.
3.) Don't drink Coors light. It foams up more than any other beer we've got, and that makes it a real bitch to pour honestly.
4.) Don't complain about the price of beer. It's not our fault it's five dollars a cup. Especially don't complain if you've already had four or five glasses - it just doesn't make sense. You're the idiot who keeps coming back. If you want cheap beer, bring your own!
5.) Guys: taking your shirt off will never, ever, EVER get you free beer. Girls: stripping will probably never, ever, mostly never get you free beer when my wife is in the booth with me. Probably.
6.) Don't drink Coors light. It's just plain stupid.
So that's it - 6 easy steps to make your oktoberfest experience, and mine, much more enjoyable. Come by our bier booth next year, and if you're a decent person and don't ask for Coors light, maybe I'll slip you a cold one on the house.
Why, yes; I did make that picture in ms paint.
posted by RJ @ 10:08 PM
8 comments
8 Comments:
If anyone complains about head on their beer, tell them the proper way to pour beer is down the center of the cup. The foam is the carbonation being released which makes the beer taste better. Then say "rook" while shaking your head slightly and go back to serving!
And how many beers did you have before making that cirle in Paint?
circle... I'm an idiot.
At Lenin's Sexual Utopia I exclusively drink Coors Light.
is that some kind of franchise? I drove by one the other day... it only had potato vodka though...
Beer on the Lord's day... Sinner! The hops need a Sabbath rest too!
Incidentally, the word-verification word for this comment was 'qoqhqk', which is the noise that the bile makes in my throat when I consider drinking Coors light.
Secondly, how does one acquire a 'bier' booth at the Denver Oktoberfest? (Oktover Denberfest?)
I'm not sure. We do it as volunteers, as some of the money goes to advocates for children, which is where my wife works.
incidentally, my verification word is rhaeggm, which is not unlike qoqhqk in most respects.
Do you think Coors Light is made from fermented, yellow, mountain snow?
and my confirmation word is eeyabftt.. because i kept refreshing the page until I got one with vowels..
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